And here we go again, friends. We have more names to add to the seemingly never ending list. A long list of girls and women who are assaulted and raped and yet their attackers walk freely off into the sunset while the victims are viciously harassed and bullied.
When will it end?
When will people finally get it through their heads that “No” means “NO”?
When will they understand that an incapacitated female is NOT an invitation to a free rape?
If you are not familiar with the case of Daisy Coleman of Maryville, Missouri you can click here to read “Nightmare in Maryville,” the excellent, informative article written by Dugan Arnett and published in the Kansas City Star that brought Daisy’s case to the public. Arnett and the Star conducted a seven month investigation and lay out all the facts clearly.
The short version is that 14-year-old Daisy and her 13-year-old friend Paige (the girls and their mothers have come forward and allowed their names to be used) had a sleepover at Daisy’s house.
Daisy and 17-year-old football player Matthew Barnett exchanged texts.
Daisy and Paige snuck out around 1am.
Matthew Barnett and his friends picked them up and drove them to the Barnett house.
They all snuck into the Barnett basement via a window.
Also at the party:
– Jordan Zech, a junior and a top wrestler and all state lineman.
– a senior football and tennis player who’s family owns a popular Maryville restaurant.
– another junior and football player.
– a 15-year-old boy who knew the older males through an older sibling.
Daisy was repeatedly given alcohol to drink until she was incapacitated to the point that she passed out and remembers nothing.
Matthew Barnett had sex with an incapacitated Daisy while Jordan Zech recorded the act with an iphone.
Daisy was so incapacitated that Matthew Barnett had to carry her out of the bedroom.
Paige was taken into a room by the 15-year-old and raped after she repeatedly said “no” and pushed him away.
The group left the basement via the window. Daisy was pulled out by Matthew Barnett and his friends since she was still incapacitated and/or unconscious.
Daisy was observed to be crying at various times.
The girls were driven back to Daisy’s house around 2am. Paige was convinced to go inside.
Matthew Barnett and his friends were unable to get Daisy into the house without being detected so they left her lying on the grass in below freezing weather. She was barefoot and only wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants.
Daisy lay on the grass in 22°F weather for hours until her hair froze and she had frostbite on her hands and feet.
Daisy was eventually able to crawl to her front door and scratch for help.
Daisy’s mother heard the scratching and found her daughter around 5am.
Mrs. Coleman called 911 and took Daisy to the hospital. Paige also went to the hospital.
Hospital doctors discovered vaginal injuries and tears consistent with rape. They also discovered that Daisy’s blood alcohol level, seven hours after drinking, was 0.13, twice the legal limit.
None of this is in dispute. Matthew Barnett and Jordan Zech and the others were brought in for questioning. They all confessed. All admitted to drinking. Matthew Barnett freely admitted to having sex with Daisy although he claimed it was consensual. The 15-year-old male admitted to having sex with Paige and also admitted she had cried “no” and pushed him away. Jordan Zech admitted recording. They admitted to abandoning Daisy in below freezing weather. Some of them were arrested and charged.
No problem, no denial. Sex with an incapacitated and/or unconscious minor girl, forced sex with another minor girl, illegal alcohol, sexual exploitation of a minor (Zech’s recording), endangerment of a child (leaving Daisy to freeze).
Plenty of evidence: confessions, witness statements, search warrant evidence (including Daisy’s panties and bottles of alcohol), hospital evidence of rape and that Daisy’s blood alcohol level was still twice the legal adult level seven hours after her last drink.
There were some repercussions:
– the 15-year-old who admitted raping Paige apparently took a plea bargain and received some time as a juvenile.
– some of the other males apparently were suspended from school and/or banned from playing sports for their behavior.
– Daisy was kicked off the cheerleading team for her behavior.
– Daisy’s mother was fired from her job because her boss felt “stressed” about the case.
– Daisy and her brothers were harassed and threatened by fellow students and their parents until the family was run out of town and moved 80 miles away.
– Daisy’s empty Maryville home burned down.
– Paige has suffered repeated nightmares and flashbacks.
– Daisy has been so depressed that she has repeatedly attempted suicide. She has been admitted to the Smithville hospital four times and spent 90 days at a girls’ facility for struggling teens.
– some of the parents of the young men think Daisy and her family owe them an apology.
But Matthew Barnett, who freely admitted having sex with an obviously drunk and incapacitated Daisy, walked freely off into the sunset. All charges against him were dropped and he did not finish his senior year at Maryville High School (I was unable to discover where he went to finish school or if he continued to play football). It’s totally unrelated coincidence (heavy sarcasm here) that Matthew Barnett is a star football player from a prominent, well connected Maryville family who’s grandfather is a former highway patrolman and state representative.
No charges, no consequences, no problems.
But all kudos to the people who are standing up for Daisy aside, why the hell is this still happening?
Haven’t we learned anything yet? How many assaults and deaths will it take?
It’s really a very simple thing. If a girl or woman says “No” then a boy or man should NOT force her to have sex. If she’s asleep or unconscious then she is obviously NOT saying “yes” so a guy does NOT get a free rape. It’s her body, she gets to decide who she lets in.
A guy does NOT get automatic free sex just because he took a girl to a movie or bought her dinner or handed her a glass of alcohol. A short skirt or high heels or lots of makeup does NOT mean the girl is free to use. A girl going to a party and drinking is ONLY saying she wants to go to a party and drink. She is NOT saying “rape me, rape me.” Being a sports star or a star anything does NOT mean you automatically get any girl you see.
Come on, everyone, say it with me:
It’s her body, she gets to decide who she lets in.
What is it going to take before people finally learn this?
Matthew Barnett and his friends did not care about Daisy and Paige. They only wanted to use them and get rid of them. They did not care whether Daisy lived or died when they dumped her in the freezing dirt. I suspect that they probably hoped she would just die and disappear and they would never have to worry about her.
Yet Matthew Barnett and his friends are perceived by some people to be the victims. Their lives are “ruined.” Not because of anything they might have done. Oh no, of course not. Their lives are ruined because some “whore,” some “skank,” some “crazy bitches” dared to complain about them. Completely out of the blue, of course. Daisy and Paige just up and attacked the poor little football players who out weighed them and were years older than them. Daisy and Paige deserve to be harassed. Daisy’s family deserves to be run out of town. Daisy should kill herself.
Stop it, people. Grow up and grow a mind.
Come on, everyone. Let’s put an end to the endless list of assaults, ruined lives, and wasteful deaths.
It’s really simple. Repeat after me:
It’s her body, she gets to decide who she lets in.
“No” means “NO”.
If you are interested in reading more about the Daisy Coleman case there are literally hundreds of articles out there.
Start with the Kansas City Star article that brought the case to light: “Nightmare in Maryville”
The Huffington Post has several articles. You can start with
“Anonymous Demands Investigation into Maryville Sexual Assault Case”
“Paige Parkhurst, Second Victim in Maryville Case, Speaks Out”
The Daily Dot has several good articles:
“Rape Accusation Unites Small Missouri Town – Against the Teenage Victim”
“Why Did YouTube Pull Anonymous’s Warning to Maryville?” This article includes Anonymous’s original internet video.
CNN has several articles and videos including
“Rape Victim’s Family: I Want Justice,” a six minute video interview with Daisy and her mother.
“Why Anonymous Wants Justice in the Missouri Rape Case”
News.com.au also has several articles including
“Maryville Rape: Daisy Coleman, Paige Parkhurst Borlan and the Story of a Town Ripped Apart by a Horrific Assault”
“Mother and Father of Matthew Barnett Lash Out Over Maryville Rape Claims Against Daisy, Paige”
Also, for those interested, remember that Anonymous is calling for a peaceful gathering in Maryville: “Tuesday, October 22, 2013, at 10:00am we will meet at the Nodaway County Courthouse in Maryville, Missouri with daisies in our hands for a peaceful protest in support of Daisy Coleman.”