Slap the GOP

First, I want to apologize to any earnest Republicans out there. I support your right to freely practice your chosen brand of politics. However, I’m about to rant a bit. So let’s shake hands and part on friendly terms because my rant is about some stupid moves by the GOP.

I was surfing the internet for interesting news the other day and I came across this tidbit. Apparently a Republican anti-Hillary Clinton Super PAC is so worried that Hillary may run for president that they have rolled out a game that lets you slap her across the face as many times as your little heart desires. There are two buttons you can press to listen to Hillary sound bites to get your dander up before you slap her. Or you can skip the sound bites and just get down to the business of beating up Hillary. To view or play the game go to The Hillary Project.

*Pause while head meets desk*

We are years away from the next Presidential run. No one has done more than hint that they might consider running. Hillary Rodham Clinton certainly has not said she is going to run. In fact, so far, she’s said she is done with politics.

But apparently the GOP is terrified of Hillary. So terrified that they are desperate to get in the opening salvo in the next Presidential wars. And what does a GOP Super PAC consider to be an appropriate opening salvo? Why, let’s beat up the woman, of course.

* Head meets desk again*

Now, in the last few months I’ve read several articles and heard a number of sound bites all about how the GOP has learned the lessons of the last election. That they have taken it all to heart and are trying to learn how to reach out to women and Blacks and Hispanics and LGBT individuals. I’ve read and heard a number of  Republicans claim that they are not having a War on Women. They claim the whole War on Women thing is nothing more than smoke and mirrors by the Democrats.

If I were a Republican and I wanted to prove my good intentions to a particular group of people I might do something like show up at rallies or pass supportive legislation or do a few positive photo ops. I might even come up with some little internet game about how we’re all just one big happy family.

But Nooooooooo.

The GOP shows its support of women, shows how it has learned not to War on Women, by rolling out a game where you slap one of the most prominent women politicians in the world in the face. Then you can laugh at the way her eyes roll. Then you can slap her again. And again. And again.

Sure doesn’t sound like the GOP has a War on Women to me.

*Head meets desk again. Pause while I go get a bandage*

Come on, GOP Super PAC. There wasn’t anything else you could come up with? It’s not even a new game. It’s been around for years, since 2000 at least. And the sound bites you used to help get Republicans in the mood to slap Hillary, they’re ancient. The first sound bite is Hillary claiming she’s “never used an ethnic, racial, anti-Semitic, bigoted, discriminatory, prejudiced accusation against anybody.” The second sound bite is Hillary supporting her husband’s ancient claims that allegations about Monica “are false allegations.” And Hillary also says “We’ve had people accuse us of murder, accuse him of drug running, accuse us of everything under the sun, and I have to believe that it is in large measure motivated by people who just flat out disagree with” the politics the Clintons believe in.

Oooooooh. How inflammatory. Certainly gets me in the mood to slap someone.

Come on! In all the many years Hillary Rodham Clinton has been in politics, this is the best you could come up with? She’s never called anyone a bad name and her husband has never fooled around and other people accuse them of things. Wow.  Obviously, based on these horrible sound bites, Hillary is the Queen of All Evil and deserves to be slapped across the face.

*Head on desk again. Ouch. Bandage not working*

And what’s with the slapping? You couldn’t think of anything else for a game? Oh sure, you also have the game where Hillary dances around and looks silly and the game where Hillary and President Obama trade punches. Again, these are old games. You could not come up with anything new? Something that doesn’t involve beating up a woman?

The GOP has suffered a lot of bad press in the last few years as various Republicans have supported policies and spouted beliefs that make it seem as if they are all trying to limit the rights of American women. Here’s a few of the slavos in the War on Women, in no particular order:

-Bill supported by Republicans would limit abortion coverage and redefine “forcible rape.”
-Republican Representative claims “legitimate rape” does not lead to pregnancy because “the female body has ways to shut that whole thing down.”
-Republican sponsored meeting on contraceptive coverage does not include women.
-Media host calls Georgetown student a “slut” and a “prostitute” for speaking out on contraceptive coverage.
-Republican Senator claims pregnancy by rape is “something God intended to happen.”
-GOP tries to destroy the Violence Against Women Act.
-Republican Governor claims that forcing women seeking abortions to undergo mandatory transvaginal ultrasounds is not intrusive because women “just have to close your eyes.”
-Republican Senator attributes military sexual assault to high “hormone level.”
-The lady leader of the Central Mississippi Tea Party believes women should not be allowed to vote.
-Fox News pundit argues that women who work outside the home are detrimental to children and families.
-Republican Governor claims working mothers cause America’s educational troubles.
-Topeka, Kansas City Council decriminalizes domestic violence to save money.
-Republican backer claims women should put an asprin “between their knees” for a cheap contraceptive.
-Under a new rule, a Republican Governor will personally decide which women are allowed Medicaid funded abortions.
-Various Republican sponsored bills would force women to undergo unnecessary and intrusive transvaginal ultrasounds before getting abortions and set prison terms for doctors who refuse to force the procedure on their patients.

Now I don’t know about you but this certainly seems like a War on Women to me. And Republicans laughing it up over a game that promotes violence against women certainly does not do anything to change that image.

So, GOP, hurry up and learn those lessons you claim you have already learned. Stop striking at American women. Stop playing games where you beat up a woman politician. A War on Women is not funny. Violence against women is not funny. Slapping a woman is not a game.

For another cry for women’s right to vaginal freedom, please check out Gen’s article, Stay Out of My Vagina, here.

7 thoughts on “Slap the GOP

  1. I am so sick of the Republican mindset condoning and encouraging violence against women. They think it's okay to smack Hilary because she scares them? Maybe I'll make a “Bend over Bohner” game to ease my frustrations. No lube necessary.
    Shallah

  2. Hausfrau mit kinder10 August, 2013
    I talk with my wallet and walk with my vote. Slap the GOP.

    Love this.

  3. Yes, it is just so ridiculous. This is the best they could come up with? Just off the cuff I can come up with a couple of game ideas and the last game system I played was a Sega Genesis.

    Maybe have a player character navigate a maze. If the player runs into a Hillary sound bite, they die. If they get to the end, they get a Republican “truth” sound bite. Or maybe the player character races Hillary by seeing which of them can kiss the most babies and shake the most hands. Whoever wins gets cheers, the loser has a baby barf on them. Or even just have Hillary constantly trying to give speeches while the player causes the crowd to heckle her and boo her until she gives up and stomps off or maybe she stomps her feet and falls through the stage.

    See, GOP? It's not so hard to find ways to ridicule your enemy without slapping them. BTW, if the GOP uses any of my ideas someone let me know so I can raise a stink about it.

    Also, as a citizen of the great state of Ohio, I want to formally apologize to the nation for Blockhead Boehner.

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